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Being a happy family, even when you are fighting

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

I don't claim to be an expert on anything but I do think I am a damn good mom and a wonderful better half to Jake. We're just like anyone else, we all argue and get annoyed with one another. It's natural, we are all different and think and feel differently.  It's how you handle it that's important.
My dad and I have the same temperament. We get mad, blow up, then we're over it. Firecracker style we say. Short tempers and sometimes just a grunt and mumble can make us feel better. It takes a lot to really make Jake mad and he can stay mad for a while. He is scary good at the silence and distancing himself part. Audrey is still in the hating hearing no and lying on the ground phase. We'll see how she turns out.
 
While we may fight, we still love each other. I know that we can tend to over think a situation and make it bigger in our heads (I do way too often), it's reminding ourselves that we are still loved. I may blow up and yell at him for throwing his dirty socks on the floor and he may yell at me for a credit card bill. Doesn't mean we're going to leave each other. Now, we are not perfect nor a perfect couple. We have had many ups and downs but what makes us a great couple is that we learn from those moments each time. It happens to all of us and it was a real struggle for us because we grew up together in our relationship. As you can see, we were just kids when we met. 16 and 17, completely love struck. It takes a lot of work to stay with someone after high school and entering the real world.
 
One of the biggest thing that has really helped us is that we put God first in our family. When we first met, I'm about to date myself here, texting had only been around a couple years. So of course we were up texting all night for the first week. I remember one of the first things I asked him was if he believed in God. Phew, so glad he said yes because I thought he was a total babe ;) and no way I would have gone out with him had he not been a believer. We have been attending church together for almost 7 years and I am glad. It is great to talk about the sermon afterwards with him and get his perspective. We baptized Audrey when she was 3 months old and are raising her to be a believer. I want her to always be happy and proud her of faith. While it is still hard for her to sit still in mass, she is happy to be there and all of the other members just love her, especially when she blows them kisses or shares her goldfish crackers.
 
The biggest thing I want you to take away from this post, is that you are loved and that is great. Say I love you constantly, be a broken record. Send each other silly texts. I love when my parents still hug me and kiss my forehead even though I'm an adult now. I will never stop asking my mom to scratch my back either. It takes a lot of work to be a family and it takes everyone to contribute. Find what works for your family and stick to it. Have dinner together with out the tv on or someone reading the newspaper. Try to find interest in your partner's interest. Jake and I love the Seahawks and have a great time watching the games together. We bond over that and I am sure he loves having a hotty around the house always rocking Hawk gear.
 
 
In the words of the late Bob Marley, "Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you are riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. Flee from hate, mischief and jealousy. Don't bury your thoughts, put your vision to reality. Wake Up and Live!
 
*Alyssa*

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